When You are Born to Be …

Four years ago if you would have asked me if I wanted kids I probably would have laughed in your face.  Not because I didn’t have the right man, the stable job, the ability but because kids didn’t seem like something for me.  I loved kids just didn’t see myself as a Mother.

Three years ago on June 29, 2013, to be exact, I found out I was going to be a Mother.  I remember feeling shocked, excited, scared and unsure.  Once it all sank in (three pregnancy tests later) I realized what this really meant I realized I was already a Mother. I realized that I was already in love with the tiny little unknown growing inside me.  I was in love with the fact that I was going to to meet someone that I created. I was scared.1659

Pregnancy was great, I loved everything about it! I was lucky!

Two years ago on Friday, March 7, 2014 (my official due date), I accepted that I was not going to meet my baby quite yet, I accepted that he was going to be late.
2341My Husband and I decided to watch a movie, The Hunger Games, around 10:00 PM I fell asleep on the couch (as I always do during movies). After the movie was over, my Husband woke me up to go to bed.

At 12:01 AM on March 8, 2014, I started getting very bad cramps. Initially I did not think anything of it but after a few sets of cramps I started to time them out. I then realized they were contractions! Eeek!  The contractions started out about 8 to 10 minutes apart growing closer together about 6 to 8 minutes apart by 3:00 AM. It was close to 3:30 AM when I decided to take a shower, blow dry my hair, and eat some breakfast. Lucas made me pancakes and eggs!  At 4:08 AM, we got in the car and headed to the hospital!
2386By 4:30 AM we were checked in and put in a hospital room. A nurse came in and checked my cervix to see how far along I was dilated. At that point I was only dilated to 1 cm. She told us to take a walk around the hospital, to help speed things along. After a half hour of walking the halls in the maternity wing, we return to the room where the nurse then hooked me up to an IV to hydrate me along with sensors to monitor our baby’s heartbeat as well as a sensor to monitor the contractions.
0F1B9893.jpgBelieve it or not, time seemed to fly by! I was instructed to take a nap, sleeping on off with a few interruptions of contractions until 9:00 a.m.  That was when the doctor came in and broke my water. By 9:10 a.m., the nurse started an IV drip of Pitocin to help bring on the contractions. At approximately 10:15 a.m., the anesthesiologist came in and started my epidural.

After the epidural kicked in, I was able to sleep a little bit better because I wasn’t feeling the contractions. Again, the time seem to have have flown by! Next thing I knew it was somewhere around 5:00 p.m., the doctor came in and checked my cervix and announced that my cervix was dilated to 8cm! She said that she was 99.9% sure that you would be here within the next two hours! Your daddy and I got so excited and started telling everybody that you would be here very shortly!

Change of plans … baby boy wanted to hang out a little bit longer.  It was not until 10:55 p.m., that I was able to start pushing. After 45 minutes of hard labor, we realize that I was not making much progress.  The issue I was having was that I could not feel the contractions because of the epidural. I made the decision to turn the epidural off so I could start feeling the labor. Once the epidural started wearing off I was able to feel the contractions and start pushing harder. A mirror was placed at the end of the bed so that I could see what was happening. The mirror really helped me concentrate on pushing in the right area, properly.
img_4274After another 45 minutes of hard pushing without the epidural, we had a baby!  As soon as I did the last push, the doctor told me to open my eyes and I was able to reach down and pull you up onto my chest! It was seriously the most amazing moment I’ve ever experienced in my entire life!

My Husband was so amazing during the labor (and the pregnancy). He held my hand; held my legs, put cold rags on my head & neck and just encouraged me to keep on going! I know that I would not have been able to do it without him!

One year ago we celebrated being parents.  We celebrated making it through the things that scared us half to death.  We celebrated you and all that you have made us become.

Today … today we laugh, smile and celebrate some more.  Today we bend so we don’t break. Today you are TWO and we are lucky!

Being a parent is the most rewarding, challenging, fun, scary title I will ever hold.  Being a parent has taught me and is continuing to teach me to be patient and kind while being stern and flexible. To have fun and not be so serious all the time.  To not drop an F-Bomb when picking up crackers off the couch for the fifth time in 10 minutes.  To be the best version of myself because someone is watching me and wants to do everything I do.

Being a parent means loving your Husband harder and to say thank you and I love you more. Happy Birthday to my little-bitty everything …. I truly believe that I was born to be your Mama.

Today, the laundry can wait …


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